''Happy Clamper'' puts us all in the shade

Swivel it every which way, fan-shaped Holly puts shade in the right place whatever the sun does. Now where's the beer, should it be in his right hand?

So you rig yourself a nice little bit of canvas and hide under that. Except the tide changes again, the boat swings and guess what? Giving up is not the thing, nor is going below where it's like an oven - you sought the sun and you found it, but that doesn't mean you have to live in a microwave. Need a brainwave? Get yourself down to Mailspeed Marine and check out the exclusive little idea they've cornered from the "Happy Clamper" in Germany.

Uh huh, who is the Happy Clamper? He's a big jovial German who rejoices in the name of Helmut Pilz and he makes two brilliant devices that sell for around fifty quid the pair to take your finding shade in the sun problems right away forever. That good? Oh yes, with his Holly sunshade and its Universalclamp 360, you're at a bliss level that reaches chokolatenfreude (the joy that comes from eating chocolate) and way, way beyond.

OK, the shade idea first. The Holly sunshade is sort of like a parasol that isn't. Actually it's a flat folding shield that arcs through a half-circle - adjustable like a fan to the full 180 degrees or less if you wish. The clever bit is that you can swivel it to any angle on its upright - and swing it round full circle. That means stand it wherever you want and you can fiddle exactly how it shields out the sun, moving it around to compensate as the sun or your boat moves the shade over you.

One of the many variations of the Universal Swivel Clamp that rotates through a full 360 degrees. Get yours before the film and TV industry buys them all for making features.

So despite all the specialist fixings he offers, he had to go one better. And he did. And - wait for it - his new, new Universalclamp 360 is "axially, radially, vertically and horizontal arbitrarily tiltable" in any position you like.

SHADE AT LAST! And so easy it makes you wonder why you had all that schlep to put up with before - or why you let it get to you. And of course you don't have to use it only on the boat. How about the garden, patio, campsite, balcony, terrace - or even in the office where the sun comes in and zaps your plasma computer screen just before you're ready for coffee?

Now the good news. Before he came over for the Boat Show, Helmut made a whole stack of Universalclamp 360's specially for Mailspeed Marine - which means they've got them in stock. Which also means you can probably order on line at the Mailspeed website -www.mailspeedmarine.com - or better still, if they haven't got them ready yet, breeze into the store at Burnham on Crouch or Warrington and choose exactly the one you want. Why?

Because perfectionist Helmut has all kinds of patterns and colours on offer - well, yellow, red and blue (14 shades of them). And you can see for yourself how indestructible it is - fibreglass rods and polyester cloth, what do you expect? Even a hurricane would battle to rip that apart - are you going to the Caribbean - that's a good test, hey? So don't forget to take one with you.

Impressive stuff. Helmut Pilz and his colleague Johann Zimmermann hold US Patents for the Holly shade.

Ah hah, you're on a winning streak. So what do you think of Holly? Is it a good idea or what? You can also win yourself something else by writing a review about it. Anything you like as long as it's useful and you can use it on your boat. Or just climb into our forum and sound off on other pet rants.